We'll kiss away each hour of hiraeth

Fewer showers they said. Drier they said ("They" being the BBC weather forecasters). So why was I rained on the whole time of the latest stage of the Welsh coastal walk?

The last stage of the walk ended in Machynlleth. As I have already (20 years ago!) walked from there to the coast and down to Llanrhystud, there is an argument to say that I could skip the next 30 miles and pick up on the way to Aberaeron, New Quay and Cardigan. Perhaps. And I have missed a good bit out this time, but, were I to head straight back to Llanrhystud, I would miss out the second-longest promenade in Wales (I have already come across the longest in Llandudno), and not only that, but I would totally miss out on the town that was my home for 4 years 1988-1992. I couldn't miss that out, so, after a week of non-stop rain, I got off the train in Borth to be greeted by wet and miserable weather.

Not to worry, I have good waterproofs, so on they went, and off I went, along the sea-front in Borth and along the cliffs to Clarach Bay and beyond.

Perhaps surprisingly, I was not the only fool out for a walk today. The first people I met asked me if they could get a bus back to Borth when they got to Clarach. I replied that the last time I lived here you could, but that was 20 years ago and I couldn't guarantee what it was like today. There were others out as well who said a quick hello in passing, but the cliff path wasn't at its busiest!

As I was walking up and along the cliffs, memories started coming back to me. This is where I would occasionally walk with some friends from college - it wasn't a regular occurrence, but it happened every now and again. Indeed, at one point there was talk of a college walking club. Our first, and as far as I know only outing was from Clarach to Borth. There was talk that we might do several Welsh walks. There was talk that we might do Snowdon. We did Clarach to Borth! Yet as I retraced these steps these years later, I could again see all my college friends in my minds eye, and couldn't help but wonder where they are now. I know where some of them are, but others do seem to have disappeared off the radar.

The walk to Clarach was pretty speedy - with the weather I didn't stop to take in the view which is what I would have done on nicer days, but on the approach to Clarach, I did have to stop and gasp when I saw beyond the bay to a headland containing a war memorial and castle. I knew that I was getting close to home now.

The original plan had been to stop in Clarach and have a cuppa and / or sandwich, but there was no-where open, and I didn't feel like sitting at a picnic table in the rain, so I pressed on, grateful that I only had one more hill and just over one more mile to go today.

This last hill is Constitution Hill, or "Consty" as it's known locally. If I have memories of the walk to Borth, I have many more of this hill. I'd trudge up it in all weathers just to get away from college, perhaps just to clear the head after finishing an essay, perhaps to have a walk and chat with friends away from walls which have ears, perhaps just to enjoy it as a walk and admire the view in its own right. Today, I noticed that there was a new path leading up from Clarach. I'm quite pleased about that actually - the last one was deteriorating, and whilst I think that health and safety has gone mad in some instances, to see a new, tarmacked path slightly further away from the cliff edge did make sense to me, especially in the rain, given that on a couple of occasions in the walk I had been losing my footing slightly - not seriously, I wasn't in danger of making any nasty tumbles, but all the same, better safe than sorry.

As I neared the top of the hill, my heart was pounding, not only because of the effort of walking up the hill, but because I was now on such familiar ground. When I saw the tower on the top of the next hill, Pen-dinas, I knew that it was now only a couple more steps, and.....   Yes ! I was looking down at the town, the town which had been my home for 4 years. After an absence of just over 10 years (almost unforgivable!) to see it from the top of Consty was definitely the best way ever. As I stood there, with the rain beating down on me, a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes, at that moment I realised I knew the true meaning of the Welsh word "Hiraeth". It's not a word you translate (though some have tried to do so with "homesickness" or "longing") which are on the right sort of lines but don't quite get there. It's an emotion, an emotion I was now feeling. For I was home. My walk along the Welsh coast had brought me to Aberystwyth.

I could have run down the other side of Consty. I didn't, but there was a sure spring in my step. At the bottom, the first thing I had to do was kick the bar - an Aberystwyth custom, usually after a walk along the prom, but for me today it was at the start of the walk along the prom, but what's that between friends! As I kicked it, I yelled out "Yes" rejoicing at being home again after far too long. A women looked at me as if I was mad - she was probably right, but I didn't care a bit!

I'll not share my memories of Aberystwyth c1990 and compare and contrast them with what I saw today in this entry of the blog - though I do think there's another entry there. Suffice to say, each hour of hiraeth was well and truly kissed away, and although I only met one person I knew, and although the time for the train home came round all too soon, it was good to be back. I promise myself that it will not be another 10 years before I return.